There’s no excuse for being drunk before 10am. Except when you’re drunk before 10am and you’re making excuses about being drunk. JUST READ IT, OKAY?
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On Robin Williams, Depression, and Coping
A very honest, well worded response to Robin William’s death. We should be giving mental illness the attention it deserves, not just today, but every day. Keep the conversation going.
The Friday Five: My Favorite Posts of the Week!
Each week, I list off my favorite posts from all the wonderful blogs I follow. I mean, if I love you, why shouldn’t the rest of the world? So, without further adieu, here are the posts that really got my attention this week!
Friday Favorites
Goodnight Already: THE MAGIC OF BIKES
Bikes are the bane of my existence, but this post was extremely heartwarming and gives the idea of an adventurous, tech-free childhood a chance.
Tales of a Charm City Chick: 30 Lessons
We like to write about all the lessons we’ve learned over the years. But have we really learned them?
Cardwords: IN WHICH I DISCUSS FEMINISM WITH A MALE FAMILY MEMBER
Feminism! But not the slap in your face feminism, subtle, objective, progressive thinking feminism is appreciated.
The Hungry Dog’s Lair: WHAT WILL YOU TELL YOUR DAUGHTER ABOUT HER BODY
Body image is so important. Not just for women, but this post is amazing. Fathers are the shit.
Kieth Garrett Poetry: THE ICE CREAM MAN
Becuase if you don’t like ice cream, you’re not a real person. #LactoseIntolerant
BONUS: Apparently Beyonce Couldn’t Find Any Words That Rhyme With Elevator
I sneaky dislike Beyonce for no reason. Probably because I’m jealous.
Who likes badges? Everyone, that’s who! If I featured your post this week, or in any previous weeks, feel free to grab one of these bad boys and slap in on your blog so the world can know you’ve been baked with greatness by yours truly.
xoxo, Meg
BUTTON SWAG
What was your favorite post (by you or someone else) from this week? Submit it in a comment and maybe I’ll feature my top five favorites next Friday!
Apparently Beyonce Couldn’t Find Any Words That Rhyme With Elevator
In case you missed being alive yesterday, the internet almost broke when Beyonce released a remix to her song ‘Flawless,’ and she finally addressed the infamous fight between Jay-Z and Solange.
The only problem was that apparently, she couldn’t find any words that rhymed with elevator, so she just repeated it.
We escalate, up in this bitch like elevators
Of course sometimes shit go down
When it’s a billion dollars on an elevator
Hey, maybe I’m being a little too harsh on the Beester (is that cool, Beyonce fanatics?). Maybe the repetitive nature of that word was for emphasis. But just in the rare event that my assumptions about pop culture billionaires are correct, I want to remind Beyonce that there are, in fact, a bunch of words that do rhyme with elevator.
Here is the list of potentially badass alternative lyrics to her verse using words that rhyme (imaginarily copyrighted by yours truly):
We escalate, up in this bitch like elevators
Of course sometimes shit go down
Because my sister is a straight up instigator
Everyone who is anyone has seen that video and knows that Solange throws the first punch. Thus, making her a straight up instigator. Rhyme life, 101.
We escalate, up in this bitch like elevators
Of course sometimes shit go down
I need help, please call the operator
This verse would be plausible because 911 is three numbers and when you’re in the midst of a sister-husband spat, you don’t have time to dial three numbers. The operator is the clear choice here, with only having to press 0, then voice your safety concerns.
We escalate, up in this bitch like elevators
Of course sometimes shit go down
They buggin’ out, I need an exterminator
Beyonce can use this clever pun about bugs and extermination to illustrate how crazy is got up in that metal box. What do you do when S and Jay are going crazy? Call the only man who can extinguish their asses.
We escalate, up in this bitch like elevators
Of course sometimes shit go down
She stole my shoes, they made of alligator
Classic sister feud here that has gone on a little too long. Jay Z finally said something because he couldn’t stand to listen to Beyonce complain about Solange stole her alligator shoes back in the day. Dude just trying to get them heels back for his lady. Can’t be mad about that.
We escalate, up in this bitch like elevators
Of course sometimes shit go down
This aint my husband, he an impersonator
On the flip side, people are really good at pretending to be people they aren’t. Have you ever been on Sunset Boulevard? Well, me either, but you bet your bottom dollar that those celebrity impersonators are about as realistic as Kirstie Alley staying away from baked goods.
We escalate, up in this bitch like elevators
Of course sometimes shit go down
Cause Arnold Schwarzenegger was the Governator
They live in California, Solange doesn’t. Jay just wanted to air his political grievances in the privacy of the elevator. Yet, Solange, being the Terminator aficionado that she is, couldn’t let it go. And then, BOOM, explosion.
Just goes to show that you can have a zillion people making you look good every day, and you still can’t find the help to put together a simple rhyme scheme. I’m content being poor and making myself look dumb, at least I don’t pay anyone.
Honest Facebook Status Updates
Because this is what people are really thinking:
- No, I don’t want to play candy crush. The only candy I crush is Butterfingers, by the bar.
- I’d love for you to not post another picture of your baby.
- I’m not bitter about your engagement, I’m just not interested in seeing four hundred pictures of your ring.
- Please, tell me more about your shitty work day.
- That screenshot conversation between you and your significant other is stupid.
- Your political rant does not make you a politician.
- That’s a lovely picture that you posted that you also took of yourself.
- I like your dog, I want to take it.
- Everyone hates Mondays, you’re not alone.
- Yes, I did know that it is cold outside, because I am alive and wore my down jacket and froze my ass off walking to work.
- I agree, the 90’s were awesome.
- That throwback Thursday pic is bangin.
- Your food looks delicious.
- Your food looks disgusting.
- I wish I defriended all of you a long time ago.
- Why do I have Facebook?
- Why do you have so many feelings that you feel the need to share via a public forum that you can never retract or delete any of these things?
- Your life is boring.
- My life is more boring.
- I’ve stalked this girl I went to high school with for sixteen minutes.
- I know you got engaged, I saw your seven hundred photos.
- Your baby doesn’t look any different between day 14 of life and day 50.
Go forth, my sons, into the land of overexposure.
POST ON!
What do you love to hate about Facebook?
The Friday Five: My Favorite Posts of the Week
Each week, I list off my favorite posts from all the wonderful blogs I follow. I mean, if I love you, why shouldn’t the rest of the world? So, without further adieu, here are the posts that really got my attention this week!
Friday Favorites
Single Girl Blogging: I Ain’t Sayin’ I’m a Gold Digger
Ned’s Blog: In the event of a Sharknado, find the nearest catfish noodler
This guy is hilarious. Everyone should follow him.
Always Rebecca: Why ‘Nice Guys’ sometimes don’t get the girl
Love, love, love this. Not that guys shouldn’t be nice, but there’s a reason why they always finish last.
Indecision May or May Not Be My Problem: Good Advice
Marriage advice exposed. People that come to your wedding have some interesting things to say after a couple drinks.
kissmeoutofdesire: PART-TIME LOVER
Wonderful post about the difference between Friends with Benefits and an actual relationship.
BONUS: This Weekend, I Kicked Adversity Square In The Face.
Because when you struggle to open a bottle of wine, the key is perseverance, and more wine.
Who likes badges? Everyone, that’s who! If I featured your post this week, or in any previous weeks, feel free to grab one of these bad boys and slap in on your blog so the world can know you’ve been baked with greatness by yours truly.
xoxo, Meg
BUTTON SWAG
What was your favorite post (by you or someone else) from this week? Submit it in a comment and maybe I’ll feature my top five favorites next Friday!
The Friday Five: My Favorite Posts of the Week
Each week, I list off my favorite posts from all the wonderful blogs I follow. I mean, if I love you, why shouldn’t the rest of the world? So, without further adieu, here are the posts that really got my attention this week!
Friday Favorites
She Said What?: DEAR TIME, I DO NOT BELIEVE YOU ARE ABSOLUTE
This is a great interpretation of time constraints and how many things we actually don’t get done in a day.
Just A Small Town Girl: The Checklist
Love this post about girls having unattainable expectations for men. Just go with it!
Truth According To Tom: Tom urges obscure heterosexuals to come out of the closet
The title is self-explanatory. Sarcasm is amazing.
Crossknit: Edits
Loved this post about how we completely cover ourselves up in order to go to work. And she talks about resting bitch face, which is a condition that is so near and dear to my face heart.
Mindful Digressions: Analogy abuse
I chose this post solely because I am a grammar nerd, and love a good analogy. And the fact that these are taken from actual student essays is comical.
Bonus:A Rational Response To This Ridiculous Article On Why Guys Think Girls Are Crazy.
Because bitches are crazy and are trying to run the internet.
Who likes badges? Everyone, that’s who! If I featured your post this week, or in any previous weeks, feel free to grab one of these bad boys and slap in on your blog so the world can know you’ve been baked with greatness by yours truly.
xoxo, Meg
BUTTON SWAG
What was your favorite post (by you or someone else) from this week? Submit it in a comment and maybe I’ll feature my top five favorites next Friday!
The Friday Five: My Favorite Posts Of The Week
Each week, I list off my favorite posts from all the wonderful blogs I follow. I mean, if I love you, why shouldn’t the rest of the world? So, without further adieu, here are the posts that really got my attention this week!
Friday Favorites
Suzie81 Speaks: Three Months Holiday a Year: The Common Misconceptions of Teaching
Loved this one for the sole reason that I used to be a teacher and every time I told people about it, their main response was, “Oh, you’re so lucky you get summers off!” I feel your pain, girl! And now I’m in marketing, not using my degree, and really grabbing life by the horns. (Sarcasm).
Wordy & Nerdy: ONCE UPON A TIME: LET’S GO EXPLORING!
I just started following Arya, and she has already amazed me with her talents. For being 14, she is incredibly observant and has a great head on her shoulders. This post in particular reminded me of being a kid, when I wanted to renounce my position in the family and live off the land like Pocahontas.
Starting Write Now: Talking To Strangers
I loved this post! I am a huge advocate of talking to new people, gaining cultural experiences, and branching out. Moving is a huge deal, especially for children who already have roots in a city or town, but this is an uplifting, fresh look at starting over.
Just Some Dish: Wordless Wednesday: So it’s shedding season again.
I chose this one because of the dogs. I fucking love dogs.
Falling From Grace: 20 Things I Hate About Being 20
Freshly twenty and learning the ropes. Don’t worry girl, I hate Taylor Swift, too. It get’s better. At least you’re not twenty-five and eating spoonfuls of chunky peanut butter for dinner.
BONUS: How To Insult People: Game of Thrones Edition
Because I’m in love with Jon Snow and I’m not afraid to say it. Someone get him to notice me. SOMEONE.
Who likes badges? Everyone, that’s who! If I featured your post this week, or in any previous weeks, feel free to grab one of these bad boys and slap in on your blog so the world can know you’ve been baked with greatness by yours truly.
xoxo, Meg
BUTTON SWAG
What was your favorite post (by you or someone else) from this week? Submit it in a comment and maybe I’ll feature my top five favorites next Friday!
The Friday Five: My Favorite Posts Of The Week
Each week, I list off my favorite posts from all the wonderful blogs I follow. I mean, if I love you, why shouldn’t the rest of the world? So, without further adieu, here are the posts that really got my attention this week!
Friday Favorites
Meaghan McGoldrick: My mother hated tattoos, so naturally I got one for her
I love this girl. She has such a similar sense of humor to me, and I always get excited when she posts something new. This post really grabbed my attention because of my love for tattoos. If you love them, and even if you don’t, you should read this because it’s heartwarming, funny, and witty all at the same time.
The Dating Diaries: Lessons Learned
Just stumble upon this blog recently, and I am so impressed. I love the headstrong, realistic attitude of this post, and it’s an eye opener especially for how I am when I’m dating someone.
Ellroy Was Here: Fear And Loathing In The Third Stall
I hate public restrooms. This was a funny post about rules, mostly unwritten, that are supposed to be followed. People tend not to listen, and they tend to make a mess. But if you learn anything from this post, please avoid the first stall at all costs.
Hand of Anake: A Simple Analogy, But I Think It Works
Love this attack on ignorance and the people using words in a derogatory manner. He puts it in a simple analogy, and for anyone who hates to be tickled, you will immediately understand the connection to a slur and an unwanted attack.
The Dimwhit: What’s In A Name? Sometimes A Racial Slur
I just love this because whenever I’m at Starbucks I always think about the people who get their name spelled wrong on their cups. It’s an interesting look at how a name can be interpreted by different people.
BONUS: I Got Lost In The Dating Pool
My not so expert advice on dating using an extended metaphor. May be my favorite post I’ve written to date. (No pun intended)
Who likes badges? Everyone, that’s who! If I featured your post this week, or in any previous weeks, feel free to grab one of these bad boys and slap in on your blog so the world can know you’ve been baked with greatness by yours truly.
xoxo, Meg
BUTTON SWAG
What was your favorite post (by you or someone else) from this week? Submit it in a comment and maybe I’ll feature my top five favorites next Friday!
I Claim Them All: A First Encounter with Banned Books
“I was a terrible teenager, because I was rebellious and that stuff happens. If anything, those books were there for me. ” — An awesome read for those who think books are boring.
Half and Half 