Today In Things That Are Almost True: Rick Ross Is A Vision of Positivity

Contrary to popular belief, we could all learn a thing from Rick Ross.

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HEY — IDGAF

There’s a lot of talk about who is too fat or too skinny these days.  And personally, I don’t think we’re doing enough as a society to reward to the high profile pioneers who have middle fingers up and just don’t give a fuuuuuuuu**k.

Instead of shaming people for trying to squeeze into something that doesn’t fit, or critiquing men and women alike for their figures, we should be embracing the few people on this earth who promote and exude a confidence that we should all aspire to obtain.

In short, the body shame tunnel has a light at the end of it, and that light is hip hop swag master, Rick Ross.

Rick Ross is on a ruthless quest involving not giving a shit what anybody thinks.  It’s clearly evident because he’s just strutting his stuff all over music videos, and he’s doing it shirtless.  Just completely avoiding social norms but choosing to express himself through music sans shirt.

Whether or not Mr. Ross is choosing to spit jams without a shirt is just a larger (pun intended) ploy to get all of us humans to forget that he is, in fact, not really a good rapper at all, is still up for debate.  But the sentiment is there, and it’s reverberating throughout lunch buffets and potluck dinners around the world.

Aside from the fact that his talent in the hip hop community is measured at less than mediocre, he does express, whether he knows it or not, a very worthy cause: positive body image.

He loves himself, all of himself.  He is happy in his skin.  He’s confident.  He’s accepted this is the suit he will live in for the rest of his life, and for better or worse, he’s going to live life to the fullest.  And frankly, he’s doing something right.  This guy is fat, happy, and a goddamn millionaire.  Meanwhile, I’m over here slaving away at a 9-5 job while I count how many cucumbers are in my salad in order to fit into a bathing suit.

If all of us gave the same little amount of fucks Rick Ross gives about how he looks without a shirt on, the world would be a better place.

If all of us just accepted our bodies, our flaws, and shortcomings, people would be less inclined to point out the negatives in others and appreciate the positives in their own skin.

Instead of thinking about how many calories you need to cut, or how many imaginary allergies you need to develop, or how many times you have to get a salad when you’re out to dinner instead of just getting the cheeseburger like your heart wants, we should be thinking about Rick Ross, shirtless, in a giant house surrounded by fat stacks of money and the occasional siberian tiger.

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#Acceptance

We salute you, Rick Ross.  We salute your commitment to maintaining a positive body image in a time where the media, faceless strangers behind a computer screen, and even real humans who have the audacity to criticize someone else’s body say things that make other people cower in fear.

Keep your shirt off, your head high, and send me a check for like a hundred grand for the promotional work I did on my own volition by writing this blog.

We should all strive to be a little nicer to one another.  We should all encourage each other and validate the good rather than overemphasize the bad.  Because positivity, self-love, and acceptance are three things that many people never attain in their lifetime.  And that, my friends, is tragic.

We all, as human beings, need to start recognizing that people are just that: people; with emotions, ideas, and energy.  We are not JUST our bodies, nor should we be allowed to think that we are defined by them.

I promise you will much rather be remembered as the person who helped people out of a funk, guided them through a depression, and built them up when they felt down than the person who criticized someone who was already weak, kicked someone when they were already down, and scarred someone beyond repair.

Love yourself, love one another, and the world may just turn its frown upside down.


What do you think about body image?  Do we have the power to change the way people perceive one another?

Proud Member of The Clean Plate Club

The first thing I do when I know I’m going out to eat is look up the menu online.

The second thing I do is show up with a predetermined idea of what I want to eat, see the menu in front of me and immediately act like I’ve never seen any of the entrees before.

I have this thing where I feel like I need to eat all of the things on the menu for fear of missing out on something delicious.  I want four different appetizers before my main meal.

Against my company’s wishes, they eventually oblige my need to fulfill all my cravings, and order an array of teaser treats and divine dishes that I will never, under any circumstances be able to finish.

Or maybe I just hated what I got.

After the meal, we box the unfinished dishes up.  We take the leftovers home.

Much like going out to dinner, life’s expectations never match reality.  Sometimes experiences aren’t what you expect.  Things don’t always go according to plan.

At the end of the day, you never really put everything out on the table.  As human beings, we like to keep things, harbor them, pack them away.  We never want to purge our lives of things that are meaningful.

We keep the leftovers of relationships, fights, and adventures.  We harbor them.  We might need them later on.

So we take them with us, put them away, and save them for later.  For better or for worse.

Leftovers come in many different forms.

On the one hand, there are the ones that stay good for a long period of time.  These are the good times, the memories you want to keep, the ones when you open up that box and remember how juicy that steak was, and how it was perfectly paired with those mashed potatoes.

Kind of like how you felt when you put on a dress after losing all that weight, and getting to pair it with those heels you’ve been waiting to wear for months.

On the other hand, there are the meals you take back and they just aren’t good after a day.  You take it out, open it and immediately regret thinking you could handle this at a later time.

These are the mornings after a night of drinking and you reach for a water bottle, only to take a swig of straight vodka.  Thank you, college.  You can die now.

Sometimes you want to take it home just because you paid for it.  Like that impulse purchase at Marshall’s, again, that you’ll only really wear once, but you had to have it, even though it just ends up claiming space in your closet.

You take them home because you feel bad.  Like that sweater your grandmother gave you for Christmas or that guy who was really nice to you at the bar (but you’ll totally be a lady, of course).

Maybe it was part of a meal that you will never forget.  Like a fight with your mother where the words still linger in the coming years.

We all have leftovers.

Except for me.  I am part of the Clean Plate Club, suckers. #NoRegrets

I Got Lost In The Dating Pool

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Caution: Enter At Your Own Risk

You know, that unfathomable abyss full of unknowns, what are we’s, and should I’s?  That God awful place in life where no one really knows if you’re out to dinner because of a mutual interest or because the end result is a hopeful bang.

Yeah, welcome to the dating pool.  Put on your best swim suit, get in the water, and Marco Polo your ass over to the deep end.  You may find what you’re looking for, or you may just want to hold onto the wall for a while until you know it’s safe to start looking.

First off, you’re going to want to utilize the buddy system.  There is no substitute for an effective wingman in the dating pool .  You’ll need that guy or girl to help when you’re drowning in guilt, self-doubt, and with the all too familiar life question, “should I text him back now or in forty hours?”

Always remember to apply sunscreen, the dating pool is never in a shortage of burned bridges, scorned lovers, and hot love making; all of which need the necessary precautionary protection.

For those who are eager to jump right in to a relationship, feel free to enter at the deep end.  There are diving boards of various heights, all of which are easy identifiers for the type of relationship you’re seeking.  If you want a low maintenance, easy going relationship, try the spring board.  If you’re looking to add a lot of time, effort, and danger, you may want to jump off the high board.

Warning:  High risk does not necessarily equate a high reward at the dating pool.  He or she may just be a psycho.

All other patrons can enter at the various laddered and step intervals found throughout the vicinity.  The shallow end steps boast most of the new relationships.  These are the ones still undefined and unlabeled, the ones still just trying to figure out if this is what they want.

People in the shallow end need not worry about those that are treading water in the deep end.  While some of the swimmers look like they have it all together and their heads above water, beneath the surface may reveal a struggle and they just know how to put on a brave face.

Because in reality, they may just want to get the fuck out of the pool and onto dry land.

Those in the deep end, and maybe in the shallow end, may not be comfortable enough in their own skin, thus, they have garnered the ever so tacky floatation devices.  Ranging from large to small, these devices signify that the person they are outfitting is neither ready, nor willing to fully immerse himself in the relationship.

This person could be wearing floaties due to a failed relationship recently.  He or she could have almost drowned due to suffocation, over-exertion due to putting in too much effort, or because he or she felt they had to babysit their previous significant other and does not want to be pulled down again.

If you see someone using a kickboard or a noodle, they are drunk.  These are crutches that we use in order to make dating more fun.  You may look like a jackass, but god damnit, you’re having fun while doing it.

While in the pool area, you may encounter a bunch of people just laying out on the sides.  These are the people who are not interested in relationships.  They do not want to go into the pool.

This means your advances will be shut down, your invitations will go unanswered, and your money will be wasted on frozen treats at the snack stand with no return on your investment.

It is easy to get lost when you’re in the dating pool.  One minute you think you’re going to sit by the water and tan, the next thing you know you dove straight into the deep end with Marcos from Prague who is visiting for the summer.

I’m not going to say it won’t last, but I am saying maybe you should have taken a floatation device with you, because that shit is going to be ROUGH later on.

There are children allowed at the dating pool.  Just be advised, it is a lot of work trying to handle kids while wearing a bikini.  One wrong move and you have a rogue boob on the loose, and that never looks good on anybody.

Unfortunately, there are no lifeguards at the dating pool.  This is an enter at your own risk environment, and if you get pulled under, there’s no one to save you but yourself.