It’s been one year since I went to war with Chipotle, and now I have a chance at redemption.
If you don’t remember, or if you don’t care, it was basically the biggest victory of all mankind and I revel in the idea of winning fair and square this year.
Chipotle has given the public another chance to WIN two free burritos this Valentine’s Day by writing haikus and posting it on social media.
I need help winning this for the second time. This will not only be the greatest accomplishment in my twenty-five years of living, I’m pretty sure it will top the day I get married and/or have children.
And god only knows when that’s going to happen because on my first date with my boyfriend, all I talked about was my feud with Chipotle, onion rings, and sweet potato fries. I think he partially thinks I’m certifiably insane. And no one wants to commit a lifetime to someone who is certifiably insane.
He’s not wrong though.
Whatever. I don’t just want this to happen. I need it to happen.
So, here’s what you can do for me. And really, if you do this for me, let me know what I can do for you. I’m really good at giving high fives, making cookies from mixes that only require adding water, and eating competitively against people who aren’t competitive eaters.
Please head over to Twitter and retweet THIS tweet and the person with the most at the end of the day today will win! I HOPE IT’S ME.
Or if Facebook is your social drug of choice, head over to Chipotle’s wall and ‘like’ THIS post by yours truly.
Thanks for supporting and fueling my inevitable descent into gluttony.
Ps – I know. My life is sad. But what else is there to do but ignore the world when there are two free burritos, chips and guac, and the fountain soda of your choice on the line? NOTHING. NOTHING I SAY.