On tantrums, touchdowns and Odell Beckham Jr. being my brother from another mother.

What do me, and a 5’11 wide receiver for the New York Giants have in common?

No, it’s not incredibly confusing hair or the natural athletic talent bestowed upon us straight from Jesus himself. But I truly thank you for thinking of me and Odell Beckham Jr. in that light. It’s flattering, really.

We both just aren’t having fun anymore.

Let me take a step back here. Two years ago I would have given my unborn child and all of my future stock in Taco Bell to be paid to write. It was all I wanted. The insatiable and unquenchable dream that loomed over me as I sat monotonously day after day at my shitty receptionist job.

Then, one day, it happened. Just like Odell Beckham Jr. on draft day. I got the call. I dropped everything. I made it. I was going to be an all-star wide receiver for the NFL with confusing, yet intimidating hair that everyone loved to hate a writer for an ad agency.

Like my doppelgänger and brotha from anotha motha, I had trained for this. Hours and hours of cranking out things to publish that made me proud. Some that bared my soul, some that made me, and only me, laugh. Others that just made my mom happy that I was doing something besides sitting in bed moping with a glass of wine at 10am.

(Breakfast wine is a thing. It’s called fermented grape juice. Read about it.)

When OBJ got drafted, I can assure with as much certainty as someone who wasn’t with him, that he was ecstatic. And when I got that call, I was too.

But the moment I accepted that job, I stopped writing for myself because I was now going to write for someone else, and that was a far more superior venture in my naive mind.

Two years and a treasure trove of words later, I’m confused.  I sit at a computer and ask my brain to do something day in and day out that it used to do on its own. Except I don’t get angry and throw a tantrum on the sideline, I wait until I get home and cry in the bathtub like a goddamn adult.

Also I’m a Pats fan so this whole meltdown is kind of funny. Cue the 18-1 jokes.

I’d wake up with funny thoughts about being an interesting sponsor choice for Head and Shoulders life or weird observations and I couldn’t wait to rush to my computer and jot them down.

Unfortunately, that rush is going away.

It’s a hard thing to realize that when you started to do what you love and love what you do, eventually you’ll stop loving it. Because work is work no matter how pretty you dress it up.

What I’m saying is, I get how Odell Beckham Jr. is feeling.

What happens when you’re not passionate about your passion?  What if the one thing that kept you sane during a monotonous 9-5 job turns out to be the very thing that makes your 9-5 so monotonous?

Two years ago my life changed. And here I sit, two years later, wondering if it was for the better or not. And I don’t know how to figure that out. Maybe it’s a change of scenery or a different way to jumpstart my brain. Maybe it’s finding out how to reignite that spark that fueled me, drove me and motivated me to get up and write every day.

Whatever the answer is, and whoever has it. Let me know. I’m all ears.

Also, if you have OBJ’s number, please let me know so I can call him and tell him to stop being such a big baby. Anyone who makes that much money is not allowed to be sad. It’s science.

Or maybe I’ll just become a professional dog walker. No one in the history of earth has ever fallen out of love with a dog.

Stand by.

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Does This Mean I’m Cool?

liebster2So I’m happy to announce that Cents and Cents-abilities has nominated me for a Liebster Award 🙂

I WON SOMETHING, GUYS!

The Liebster Award is pretty much the equivalent of being the new kid in school, you’re recognized cause you’re new but no one really knows anything about you.  Thus, you must do the following things:

  • Link back to the person who nominated you.
  • Answer the 10 Liebster questions given to you by the nominee before you.
  • Pick 10 bloggers to be nominated for the award with under 200 followers.
  • Come up with 10 questions for your nominees to answer.
  • Go to their blogs and notify your nominees.

Here are my answers:

1. How long have you been blogging?

I started back in 2009 when I studied abroad in Ireland, it’s cringeworthy mostly because I completely disregarded the rules of proper grammar and capitalization.

2. What inspired you to start blogging?

I wanted to keep a log of my travels abroad, and let my mother know that I was alive and well and wasn’t a kidnapped and held hostage like that girl in Taken.

3. What advice do you have for new bloggers?

Write every day. Write about anything.  Find your voice.  You only get better with practice.

4. What is the hardest thing about blogging for you?

Trying to come up with fresh, innovative, entertaining content is tough!  But somehow my brain works in weird ways and I find that talking about burritos and pictures of myself from middle school are sufficient ammunition for posts.

5. Describe yourself in three words.

Hungry.  Impulsive.  Creative.

6. What is your favorite post on your own blog?

Catharsis, my post about reflecting on my first year moving away from home is up there, but it is tied with Sole Mates, my post about socks in the dryer.

7. If you were going to write a blog post about your life, what would the title be?

Directionally Challenged.  (I don’t know where I’m going.  But I know how I got here.)

8/9. If you could have a super power, what would it be and why? 

Teleport.  Hands down.  Plane tickets are EXPENSIVE, and I got places I need to see before I kick the bucket.

10. If you weren’t blogging about (your blog’s subject matter), what would you blog about? 

I’d love to take a stab at blogging about animals.  Puppies, kittens, whales, the whole kit and caboodle.  If I had more patience and a higher IQ, I totally would have loved to be a vet.  But who has time for that much school when you have an entry level job and you live in the basement apartment in your building?

 

Here are my nominees (those nominated must answer my ten questions below, OR ELSE):

British Chick Across the Pond

The Wandering Poet

Cents and Cents-abilities

http://renardmoreau.wordpress.com/

John Greaves III

Life in Portsong

U Mad Yet?

The Importance of Being Edited

ViewSplash

Dr. Killpatient’s Weird Fiction

 

My Ten Questions: 

  1. What made you start a blog?

  2. Where do you see your blog going in the future?

  3. What talent (other than your fantastic writing skills) do you wish you had?

  4. What is your dream job?

  5. What is your favorite post you’ve written?

  6. Describe yourself in three words.

  7. What are 3 goals on your Life To-Do list?

  8. Who would be your dream guest poster?

  9. Who is your BFF in your head (meaning a celebrity that doesn’t know you exist, but you know you’d be best friends if they did)?

  10. What would you title a blog post about your life?

..

Thanks again, and congrats to my nominees!

xox Meg