Have you ever stayed in on a Friday night drinking wine and wondering what position you’d chose to pose in as a gargoyle for the rest of time?
If you have, why didn’t you call me? And if you haven’t, you clearly not only have friends, but way less time on your hands than I do.
What I realized while arbitrarily planning to cement myself in time, is that a lot of what I do revolves around me being comfortable. Like, if I’m going to be plastered in a position for the rest of time, you best believe I will try to avoid cramping.
This is what I would look like if I was a gargoyle.
To prove my point, yesterday, I had my legs vertical to drain all the lactic acid out of my fat ankles while I was simultaneously trying to reach for my beer, and my roommate boyfriend captured the ultimate depiction of the laziest human being on the planet.
help.
Now, I know what you’re thinking. Why didn’t he just help? And while that question still remains in my brain, and I will subsequently keep it for ammunition the next time he asks me to get something for him, by taking this picture of me struggling to achieve the impossible, yet really, really simple task of picking up a beer, he unknowingly captured the picture that represented the entire year of 2014.
2014 gave me cramps.
No, I’m not talking about lady cramps, although, I’ll do almost anything to avoid those. I’ll steal a baby. Don’t tell me I won’t.
(For legal purposes, if your baby goes missing, it was not me. I still have cramps and that’s how you know I’m telling the truth)
I’m talking about metaphorical cramps. These are the things that remind us something needs to change in order to become the best possible version of yourself. Sometimes they’re good reminders, like the soreness after a hard workout telling you that you did everything right.
But then there are the not so fun ones, like the headache after a hangover, constantly making you question whether or not you’ll drink again.
Hint: You will drink again.
2014 was mostly full of bad cramps that yielded good results, because change is not always easy; sometimes it’s hard, it sucks, and you hate it. But that’s life, and it’s unexpected as hell.
There was that chip on your shoulder.
You know, that thing that happened a while ago that you can’t really get over. Everyone can tell everyone else to stop holding grudges, but it’s never that easy when you’re the one who has to let go and move on. Most times, it’s easier to stay mad at the person than confront the actual issue at hand. I guess that’s why it’s a chip though. Whoever it was, and whatever they did, they kind of ate away at you.
You may have been a pain in the ass.
Or maybe you had one. Whichever it was, remember that no one likes a pain in the ass. If you have a pain in the ass you should get rid it. Immediately. The last thing you need after a hard day of work is to come home, sit down, and be constantly reminded that someone or something is still annoying the crap out of you.
Maybe you found out your Achilles heel.
There is nothing, I mean nothing worse than figuring out what can hurt you the most. But the good thing about finding it out, is that you can make strides towards preventing that from happening. Surround yourself with people that will be beneficial to you in the long run, those who will support you and grow with you, rather than those who will hold you back.
You realized life is better without the headaches.
If you’re constantly on edge, stressed out, or unhappy, there’s something wrong. Knowing what may literally be causing your headaches is one thing, but eliminating them can be an entirely different process. I love coffee. So, so much. And when I don’t have it, I get a massive headache. Is the risk of eliminating coffee out of my life worth it? Not yet. But if someone or something in your life is causing you way more stress than comfort, take a closer look, and maybe you’ll decide that eliminating them gives you a clearer head.
Sometimes you have to accept that cramps are part of life.
Just like lady cramps, people come and go. There is never going to be a year where you won’t have to make sacrifices in order to improve your overall well being. I mean, come on, taking birth control pills to prevent yourself from becoming a she-beast each month is proof enough.
But bumps in the road are par for the course. People come in and out of our lives for different reasons at different times. Not everyone is meant to be permanent. That doesn’t mean the time spent with you was invaluable. We can all learn something from someone else, we can all help each other become people that we want to be. We just don’t all have to hold hands and walk each other to the finish line.
Because no friendship or relationship, regardless of how long or short, is insignificant. Those people were brought into your life for a reason, and maybe they’re staying for a while, but maybe they’ve left this year.
But when you start to get a headache, become a pain in the ass, or develop a chip on your shoulder, put up your feet and get rid of the cramp right there. It’s better to deal with problems head on than to be lazy and let them unnecessarily morph into something bigger.
And this is also where I need to take my own advice.
Half and Half 