Life Is Too Short Not To Risk Your Life For Instagram

Pics or it didn’t happen. Am I right?

Yesterday I went on what I thought was going to be a leisurely Sunday hike and what actually turned out to be a near death experience at the expense of getting mad likes on my instagram account.

Hey Leo DiCaprio, I’m still available.  Call me. #TitanicPose

Anyways, in an effort to celebrate my stupidity in exchange for some social media gratification, I’ve compiled a list of things that you should just do because life is just too goddamn short.

Life is too short, so:

  • don’t hold grudges
  • don’t count five seconds in order to eat things off the floor
  • don’t wait for the crosswalk signal. just go. seriously.
  • don’t be unhappy
  • try not to develop allergies to food – come on bodies, ADAPT ALREADY
  • wear shoes that are comfortable
  • eat an entire box of cereal in one sitting
  • try all flavors of Ben and Jerry’s ice cream
  • care about what other people think
  • don’t care about what other people think
  • be stupid
  • don’t be stupid
  • don’t grow up… like all the way
  • enjoy the finer things in life
  • pretend you’re still underage at the movie theaters in order to get discount movie tickets
  • pretend you’re of age at the liquor store in order to get alcohol
  • don’t skimp on ambition when it comes to your career
  • don’t settle
  • try and get through the express checkout lane with more than 15 items
  • drink lots of wine
  • eat lots of oreos
  • figure out what makes you happy
  • get hurt a bunch of times (preferably metaphorically, but maybe physically)
  • fall in love
  • then curse it when it slaps you in the face
  • learn lessons and make mistakes
  • spend all your money
  • live on your own
  • and when you do live on your own, eat like you’re seven again because it’s all you can afford
  • listen to bad music
  • find things you like about yourself
  • change the things you don’t (preferably metaphorically, but maybe physically)
  • don’t drive like a jackass
  • use your turn signals
  • say thank you and please and hello and goodbye
  • be nice
  • make a bucket list
  • wear sunscreen
  • eat healthy
  • but always leave room for dessert
  • do what you want
  • but not at the expense of other people
  • stay hungry (preferably metaphorically, but obviously physically)
  • stay healthy
  • treat people the way you want to be treated
  • do things you don’t want to do
  • remember everything
  • leave a legacy


 Have you ever made a bucket list? How far did you get on it?

11 thoughts on “Life Is Too Short Not To Risk Your Life For Instagram

  1. Great list! But your picture made my stomach turn (metaphorically and also a bit physically)… It looks like you’re about to fall. Oh, and hi to Leo, whoever that may be. 😀

  2. I actually do have a bucket list, and I’m slowly working on it. One was “not end up on 16 and pregnant” and I’m 19 now so yay, me. hahaha but really, I’ve already done some traveling to Europe, so that’s one off the list. I’ve also managed to find a boyfriend and (hopefully) not end up a cat lady so I think I’m doing okay.

Talk is cheap, but I'm on a budget anyway...

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