Pics or it didn’t happen. Am I right?

Yesterday I went on what I thought was going to be a leisurely Sunday hike and what actually turned out to be a near death experience at the expense of getting mad likes on my instagram account.

Hey Leo DiCaprio, I’m still available.  Call me. #TitanicPose

Anyways, in an effort to celebrate my stupidity in exchange for some social media gratification, I’ve compiled a list of things that you should just do because life is just too goddamn short.

Life is too short, so:

• don’t hold grudges
• don’t count five seconds in order to eat things off the floor
• don’t wait for the crosswalk signal. just go. seriously.
• don’t be unhappy
• try not to develop allergies to food – come on bodies, ADAPT ALREADY
• wear shoes that are comfortable
• eat an entire box of cereal in one sitting
• try all flavors of Ben and Jerry’s ice cream
• care about what other people think
• don’t care about what other people think
• be stupid
• don’t be stupid
• don’t grow up… like all the way
• enjoy the finer things in life
• pretend you’re still underage at the movie theaters in order to get discount movie tickets
• pretend you’re of age at the liquor store in order to get alcohol
• don’t skimp on ambition when it comes to your career
• don’t settle
• try and get through the express checkout lane with more than 15 items
• drink lots of wine
• eat lots of oreos
• figure out what makes you happy
• get hurt a bunch of times (preferably metaphorically, but maybe physically)
• fall in love
• then curse it when it slaps you in the face
• learn lessons and make mistakes
• spend all your money
• live on your own
• and when you do live on your own, eat like you’re seven again because it’s all you can afford
• listen to bad music
• find things you like about yourself
• change the things you don’t (preferably metaphorically, but maybe physically)
• don’t drive like a jackass
• use your turn signals
• say thank you and please and hello and goodbye
• be nice
• make a bucket list
• wear sunscreen
• eat healthy
• but always leave room for dessert
• do what you want
• but not at the expense of other people
• stay hungry (preferably metaphorically, but obviously physically)
• stay healthy
• treat people the way you want to be treated
• do things you don’t want to do
• remember everything
• leave a legacy

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 Have you ever made a bucket list? How far did you get on it?